Fear

Our first year of marriage, I lived in constant fear.  I could never name my fear, or really describe why I was afraid.  It was a comfortable little niche in which to live–I was afraid and it was safe.  When you’re really and truly living in fear, you cannot challenge yourself to grow exponentially or let go of lingering doubt.  Though I felt quite safe, I was incredibly miserable.

Eight months into our marriage, my husband put his foot down.  My husband is incredibly brave and very, very determined, which can sometimes come across as brash and bossy.  He’s exactly what I need.  He isn’t afraid of anything except the occasional snake {and who doesn’t have a phobia or two?}.  He made it very clear that while I felt safe in my little niche of fear, I was killing my faith in God, humankind, and myself.

I hate it when he’s right.

He helped me conquer my unnamed fears by first giving them titles.  My personal fears were named Death, Budget, and Failure.  After they each had proper titles, he helped me tell them NO.  Sometimes it was daily…sometimes hourly…sometimes minute by minute.  The more I said NO, the better I felt.  I stopped fueling my fears and instead, began feeding my faith.

What would you do, I mean really do, if you weren’t afraid of anything?

Would you travel without fear of planes, trains, or automobiles?

Would you start a new adventure, without fear of failure?

Would you live with purpose, without fear of judgement?

Would you start that business venture  you’ve always dreamed about, without fear of losing?

When you tell your fear NO, the world is a place of endless opportunity.  Why deny yourself what the Lord has freely given?

When I ended Fear’s reign over my life, I also ceased worrying.  Sure, I still sweat the small stuff like, “Oh, I hope I don’t burn those cookies,” or, “Man, I really hope my car can fit into that parking slot.”  But the big stuff like Death, Budget, and Failure?  Things of the past, my friends, and I’m so thankful for it.

I no longer experience the crippling anxiety of my past when we make big decisions.  God has a plan for our life together.  I believe in His plan.  Fearing the uncertain or the unknown is a waste of time and {I believe} an insult to God.  Put your faith in the Lord, cease feeding your fears {whatever they are named}, and begin leading the life He has intended for you.

My prayer for 2013 is that you may experience the same peace that I now have.

XOXO,

Court

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